Pairing through the Pain…
The Hot Ones Challenge!
When I was studying for my WSET 3 wine qualification, I clearly remember my reaction when reading the paragraph about chilli heat in the chapter on pairing wine with food:
“Chilli heat is a warming or burning sensation, and levels of sensitivity can vary greatly from person to person. There is also huge variation in how pleasant or unpleasant this effect feels to the individual. The effects caused by chilli heat are greater in wines with high alcohol levels than those with lower alcohol levels. Alcohol also increases the burning sensation of the chilli; some people enjoy this effect.”
I almost laughed out loud at that last line. I felt like the author had wanted to write afterwards in brackets: (These people are insane.)
I will freely admit that I am “these people”. So is my husband. One of our most memorable dinners was at a Mexican restaurant, where we both reached for the Scorpion Disco hot sauce (made using the Trinidad Scorpion chilli – so called because of the sting in its tail). Twenty seconds apart from each other, we rode a spice wave that gathered in momentum over the course of about five minutes. It’s a chilli dragon we’ve been chasing ever since.
Anyone who has been in a long-term relationship will (unless they are supremely talented gift givers) know that finding personal, relevant presents for your other half becomes more challenging as the years go by. So when I discovered that it’s possible to purchase a set of ten fiendishly hot chilli sauces, as featured on Hot Ones (a YouTube series by the fabulous First We Feast), I felt like I had nailed Birthday 2024.
We’ve spent many a Saturday morning crying with laughter at a swearing Gordon Ramsay, or marvelling at the staying power of Scarlett Johansson’s lipstick, all while watching these A-list celebs attempt to remain coherent while eating hot wings. (If you’ve never seen it, stop what you’re doing right now and watch Sean Evans grill his latest chilli victim.)
In short, I felt my birthday present was a stroke of genius. But what does any of this have to do with wine?
If a job’s worth doing, it’s worth overdoing, as they say. Two months later, we had developed a slightly complicated party format, involving a pub quiz-style set of chilli-themed questions, synched lights and music, a giant leaderboard, costume code and (of course) bucket loads of hot wings. We had dragged 12 of our best friends into this madness, most of whom have no tolerance for spice but seem to like us enough that they played along (or perhaps they just love a party).
Naturally, booze was involved. Mike took charge of the beer while I went into wine-pairing mode. What would be the ideal accompaniment to having one’s lips burnt off by aggressive amounts of capsaicin? Someone has to ask the important questions.
In the end, I plumped for two good-value options (even I could see that spending a lot of money on wine people might not be able to taste was probably not wise). I assumed that our friends would not, in fact, “enjoy the effect” of a burly, boozy red with their hot sauce-dowsed dinner. So I stuck to lower alcohol whites with a hint of residual sugar and plenty of fruit – both known to tone down a spicy meal. Here’s what made the cut:
Well of Wine Viognier, Languedoc, France (2022)
I’ve been on the fence about Viognier in the past, but it’s a grape I’m learning to appreciate more as time goes on. This one is aromatic without being overly perfumed, pleasantly tropical (think lychees rather than bananas), and dry but with a touch of honey. I served it fridge-cold (cooler than I’d usually serve a white wine) and it did its job admirably when it came to the hot wings. Available from Bilderdijk Wijnhuys for just under €10 a bottle.
Winzer Krems Orange Grüner Veltliner, Niederösterreich, Austria (2023)
Grüner Veltliner is Austria’s signature crisp white, which lots of people rave about – especially in summer. Winzer Krems, however, has vinified the same grape as an orange wine, which means the juice has spent around 18 days macerating on the grape skins. That lends it an orange blossom aroma, apricot/clove flavour, fuller texture and excellent ability to stand up to spice. Available from Gall & Gall for €11.29 a bottle.
Side note: if you want to know more about pairing orange wine with food, read this:
Other options for beating the burn
Once we reached hot sauce #8 (known as Da Bomb and infamous among Hot Ones fans), no amount of grape juice was going to cut it. One friend abandoned the party to go and buy three litres of milk from the store. Another started mainlining raw carrots. And a third discovered that slices of orange dusted with cinnamon were a cunning trick to beat the burn. (Although I would argue that the last one had a similar flavour profile to my orange Grüner Veltliner!)
Whatever their cooling technique of choice, absolutely everyone got further through the challenge than they thought they would. I’m not sure they’ve yet forgiven me, but they’re sufficiently competitive to tolerate pain for long enough to get through a party. And as for me and my spice-buddy husband, we had just about the most fun two chilli addicts with a dressing up box can have.
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This had me cracking up! I knew I liked you. My partner and I are spice addicts as well. We grow Carolina Reapers, Ghost Peppers and about 8 other varieties every year. We dehydrate the ones we can't eat fast enough and make spices with them. We are both so used to our insane heat level, when I have friends over and make dinner (thinking I was being extremely mild) they say the food is so spicy they cannot eat it. OOPS. I love your wine choices for spice!